Life Is Complicated

Long time no see...

2011-12-25T02:23:00.000-08:00

It seem like quite some months...
I did not post anything...
I guess me been too busy up and down studying..

Last 2 month, prepare for my final exam...
Once all finished, people start organize 21th birthday party..
I went dono how many times already...
Sometime too long did not meet up.. it will end up to be stranger....

I really miss the college life..
It just end in a blink of the eyes...
I don't even remember what I done last 4 years....
It just accumulation of knowledge...

After exam, everyone seem like tension on find jobs...
Posting at Facebook like nobody business...
I even went to Melaka with a group of friends...
Main Target : FOOD

Melaka a lot of food... which like a food paradise....
Cannot even finish finding in one day...
The other side of it....
We found a bad location of hotel...
It also make us suffer with NO WIFI !!!

After all those things...
I don't even know I found a job...
It was so lucky...
I did not really email the company....
but faith just bring me into the company...
Which I can said the POWER of QUAN XI (relationship)

This is how I found Everest Logistic Integrate Sdn. Bhd.
It was not big company... and it was not small company...
I just started 5 days of working...
I enjoy... I gain knowledge... I find solution by my own...
Next week going to be more challenging...

After that 5 days, I went for Christmas party at my friend house...
Can see some drama and also had some joke around....
As usual having steamboat and alcohol...

But there is one things come into my mind...
all was just a flash light.... because silly past things...
It all started with my friend which introduce me to chat with her...
The first time, I does not know WHO is that person I was sms quite some months...
then we meet up at JL house... I was very shy and can't said much things...
I did not talk to her that time... As usual... not dare to talk to girl >.
( I was from boy school... suddenly talk to girl, it will felt awkward)
Then ended up... Did not continue sms her already...

Yesterday, just met her... I was shy also...
because of the silly things that I done last time...
I does not know what her thinking toward that time...
But I know I was so silly sms one unknown and ended met up somewhere...
That how I always become curious on every single things....

Does not wanna drag more stories about it already...
That was just one scene from the past...

Friends?

2011-10-08T00:31:00.000-07:00

Life is always the same with me...
There only some event had make me piss off...
There always a person that always make me happy...
I know some will see what I wrote here... and some will just ignore like nothing happen...
Friends for me always a passersby...
Once they come, they put fire, they put ice, they put everything...
After a few moments, it goes like nothing happen...

I know some will be regret and some will be sad after what happen...
There moment, I left the table with those angers....
I went back to every mistake that my friends did....
The place where they make people misunderstanding...
The place where they was not purpose to do it....
The place where they had been done for thier own sake...

All this time, helping my friends...
What more can I get as a payoff ?
Nothing...

Without thinking of that...
Do you ever think what kinda life I when through??
Hearing all those sad news towards my friends...
And all I did is convince them back like nothing happen...
All this happen when the college started in Freaser Park...

Without thinking that...
Do you ever think of my difficulties bringing stuffs to Freaser Park??
I always bring a lot stuffs... it because I worry I miss out something...
My bags was so heavy while I went up and down of college...
Bringing something that is fragile... It was my main concerns...
Bring foods? Bring Assignment? Bring one whole box of books?

Nothing had payoff...
Being tired after or before the class...
It will be normal for me...
One hour inside the bus can't do much but sleep...

While you still said I did not concern of you all??
While you still complaining of all those craps??
All those angers from the previous life in Klang and what I having now...
was not just a simple one... It just accumulated inside my heart...

Other than all those things...
Telling you all about my feeling was not worth at all...
Because of the EGO inside... which does not think of others situations...
Specially those that does not really concerns and appreciate a person beside them...
Really does get people angry so easily...

Some said I been too emotional and some will said I was nothing at all...
I don't care whatever stuffs you think of...
I just being a human being that live in this worlds...
You can judge me like whoever care...
But at least judge it on a correct ways...

Life goes on like usual...
No matters who beside me... It was not the concern at all..
I can be alone in this world... I can be whatever you think of...
I just being me and myself...

Signing off,
Tommyterm.

Memorable time with my car~!

2011-09-26T09:26:00.001-07:00

One fine day, I was driving this friend on the way...
I was describing how I am going to modified my car and all those...
But seriously cost a lot....
His reply like "It is worthy to modified this old junk?"
I was talking on body kit, radio, colour my car, and all those...
My mind was saying: Yes, of course... A car just like a moving home...
Try to think....
How much time you had spend on driving? 1 hours? 2 hours? and even some short distance....
The worst is more than 3 hours...
This tiny little space which can't do much things...
Long journey, which we can done is talking, eating and sleeping...

There is when you start thinking on something to do...
I had experiences several times on long journey...
BORED and TIRED...

So I just told him... Ya, it is worthy... and try asking another thing...
"Do you think I should throw this old junk and get a new one??"
he said No, I know it still can work for several years...
but modified until like that... Was not nice...

There is when I started thinking...
I had a lot bitter and sweet memories in this car...
IMPOSSIBLE throw it away....
I had owe this car a big help which carry me around...
Back to past,
driving some student back home and earning some pocket money....
driving me up and down of the town to go school..
driving me to clinic when I am sick...
driving me to shop to grab some stuffs...
driving me to anywhere at anytime...

I had only one car in my life...
Which help me a lot and giving me the things that money can't buy...
Car is just like a girlfriend...
No matter what my girlfriend look like...
Just a little make over here and there....
It will become beautiful...
Car also the same...
Just do here and there...
It become a brand new car...

P.S.
Leroy and Nicole, Do you still remember the time we are small, how we use to play and talk in the car?
It give a really nice memories between us... ^.^

Saturday and Sunday

2011-09-18T04:42:00.000-07:00

Every Saturday and Sunday seem to be the same for me...
No much activities but more in sleeping...
Those tired is from Monday until Thursday...
Wake up early and can't get a deeply sleep.....
Which I means by 4~5 hours of sleeping...

All because of traveling to college...
All because of worry...
All because of undone jobs...

I wish all these will gone forever...
but one last semester... before it ends...
Suffer to get benefits... so I does not mind so much...

This Saturday and Sunday....
really damn tired... slept more than 12 hours...
even get afternoon nap... 2~3 hours...
eat and sleep... wondering can become fat or not >.<

Really tired make me lazy and sleepy...
Mentalist drama make me gone mad...
Next week Friday gonna have a test coming soon...
And I am demotivated...

Wondering what to do... and what to done...
Assignments also coming soon...
@@ A lot undone stuffs and I am demotivated...
Really gonna start off my MA and get ready for all those stuffs...

P.S. Sometimes felt lonely in a big world and hoping someone accompany me...

Getting rip my lazy

2011-09-08T09:05:00.000-07:00

This few day felt myself was so lazy to do stuffs...
I know a lot of assignment is waiting for me...
Mid term test is coming...
First assignment that need to be submit is on the coming Monday....
and I was like haven't started my brain....

Tutorial like a mountains every week...
TIRED is all in my mind....
That why I come across DRAMA...
Don't know who is the hell create this...
Drama make me more lazy...
Back home... drama....
Do homework time... drama....
Like totally addicted like drugs....

All had to end in one ways....
Get my brain function....
Put the biggest full stop at drama...
and once nothing to do... start do HOMEWORK...

Tommy.. oh Tommy...
Faster get prepare for everything in front...
Huge war is coming... cannot be lazy d...

To Myself so can get motivated... >.<

Signing off,
Tommyterm

My mid semester started..

2011-08-27T07:52:00.000-07:00

Now is the beginning of my mid-semester...
One week holiday... wondering to start studying...
Lecture so fast like train...
My brain adsorb so slow >.<

Last week,
I started to imagining how my life in the future going to be...
so I started just a based of every foundation of life...
Morality and the meaning of life...
Once we are small... we learn step by step...
and we know our mistake to be learn...
But once time goes on....
we started to forget what we had learn...
there goes our mistake...

There how I learn from this little monk...

He is impatient person just like you and me....
Mistake that he done... is every foundation of everyone life...
Therefore, I continue watched this short clip until the end...

I learn and pick up some mistake that everyone had done...
Life is easy when everyone know the meaning of it...
This little monk show had open up my mind...
I had post a few on Facebook for share to all my friends...
Most of it was regarding to all my close friends...
the mistake that they had done... but does not realize...

Giving myself 2 day break...
so that I had a stable mind to start my study...
4 week of study.... but had not adsorb properly...
manage my time to get what I wanted...

Signing out,
Tommyterm

Yes... It is today...

2011-08-21T08:34:00.001-07:00

A miles back to my past...
What I felt and What I cry for...
That is What I learn from the past...

I fall like the market share drop rapidly...
and I growth twice higher than it drops...

BES 3100, I was taking now in this semester...
I did mentions before the words...
"I can be social but not 100% social because of my past experiences"
My past experiences... I was thinking at that moments was...
the robbery that I had experiences...
(5 robbery in my life)
the missing of my beloved person that hurt...
the lost of all my friends joys...
the isolated from a group of friends...
and the last was the cruel of this reality...

All this past experiences...
was telling me to be careful in the future...

and I always stated " the future is uncertainty "
sometimes... you may get hurts...
sometimes... the loved ones missing...
sometimes... you might not be in this world...

we never know what going to happen...
It all reality that we had to face...
I glad... my friend (you know who you are) understand me...
and all those I mentions and convince him...
really make a great big step moving towards the future....

signing off,
Tommy term

Everyone was depressed but who is the most depressed?

2011-07-14T07:41:00.000-07:00

Today I purposely create an event after that Pangkor trip....
The first thing want to know is the reaction from my group..

Talking about this Pangkor trip...
ECU was a small group that had money since the beginning but never been use before...
I know it not my hard work and others...
but as the leader of the club... should had divide properly to each people...
Since they decide to paid for the accommodation of Pangkor trip...
but the main problem is who was there??

I know my group had been boycott for that trip...
but at least should hide it properly...
Facebook (public place)... had been release all those picture and comments..
and guess what??

me, myself was already known to be SOLO...means one man show...
ya, I was all alone by myself even in group and not...
once I was not in group... I try to include myself into others group...
others in the sense of the girls group, Howe group and also the marketing group...
with different channel and different communication...
I was tried my best to suit myself...

but what is the most sad case??
the Pangkor trip was include all of them....
never one of them come just ask me wanna join them ??
I guess... me just a side dishes that nobody know I was there or not...

Friendship is hard to make... but so easy to be break...
I guess had to life myself all alone without any care and also friends...
my group members, some was upset and some was not...
The upset one, I had no ideas why they upset....
but who hurt the most??
guess it was me again...
life is sad and pathetic...but every time need to stand up and walk alone...

I hope everyone will be fine after all...
since it past and just forget it...

signing off,
Tommy

As the time goes.....

2011-06-20T10:21:00.000-07:00

My mind keep thinking of negative side... but what worst it come true....
Never a time that my mind telling the positive side ..
sometimes it happen... I glads of it...

What more??
Final exam coming... the more worries I am...
Before the shift of college....
As mind told me...
1)That Group study does not had my portions..
2)The topics become lesser and lesser each time....
3)The Gap is getting larger...
4)No matter I inside or not... still the same...

Guess what ... All come true...

I always make a backup for every things...
what more? gonna be loner...
fight and survive by myself....
gonna social to others that on the same road....
finding topics to talk?

Seriously no topics to talks... except for gossip... lol.. -.-
What to do ...
Life come, Life goes...
Friends come, Friends goes...
haih.. does not want to said anymore about this...
tired sometimes...
-------------------------------------------------------------
Now more worries me;

Final Exam on Audit and CM
What to do after exam cannot go back stay until 4.30pm?
Wasting my time at college for 4hour 30 min?
All exam morning... sure sleepy once reach at college

haiz... need to think and plan d...
If there are no reply from them...
I guess had to travel d... what to do?
life is pathetic as you think...

Sign off,
Tommyterm

Maybe I think too much or felt isolated somehow...

2011-06-17T11:49:00.000-07:00

I know I quite a number of months and days was not typing this blog...
I thought that after my final exam will update...
suddenly had to make advance update to release my anger...
final is near, and my mood was down....

I don't know whether I think too much or already been isolated....
some was wonder what happen to me and all those....
I just had one words to describe today.... "lonely"

I went to college by bus...
reach college and saw nobody....
then I loitering around alone...
several minutes... I saw my friends...
thought why suddenly so early reach...
so asked and get no reply.... then I guess they are too tired so ignored me...

After a while... the class started and nobody told me...
I was just outside... and all entered the class earlier than me...
miss several minutes at the beginning of the class...
I don't mind cause I suppose to be inside the class waiting instead of outside..

A few minutes was given break time..
the girls was busy talking so secretive ...
so I asked and reply "don't let me know"
so I like fine... I don't mind cause maybe they talking about women stuffs...
then what wrong with that finger pointing thingy??
sure said something that is not women stuffs d....

I like "oh ok... instead u all so secretive... why don't I went outside?"
so I went outside class and loitering around again...
before I went outside... one of my friend just come said some "bad news"
I like... "O.o why don't after class we did the changes?"
after a several minutes.... my friend just come back with his hand of assignment...
2 assignment... I like " where is mine portions? invisible sitting here?"
which bring my mood down...

I did went out of the class somehow...
to chat with some seniors... to make myself cool down...
went back in the class... and it goes until it ends of the class...

After the class, friends asking me " you did the changes?"
I reply in different answers... then they start said I lazy to make changes....
I like "my mood was down d... really no mood to do all those stuffs d...."
After they done those printing and stuffs...

So went to eat.... walking halfway...
I thought I heard " economic rice shop there "
so I walk halfway... they suddenly change direction... I like "huh?"
so enter the another shop and notice they already change places...
Ok... fine... I don't mind...
so normally after lunch... back home straight...
they change direction again.... I like "huh?"
I keep thinking...
"Hello, I around here... at least tell me where you all going la.."
already no mood... then plus with another one...
damn damn down my mood goes...

Instead of listening to the presentation... I went loitering around again...
I don't know they did not notice I a bit different today... @@
Haiz... really speechless...
I become invisible somehow...
"nobody see me, nobody ask me, nobody think I am there"

that is what got my mood down...
I think after write this... I had to go to bed...
Tomorrow will be another day to go...
and need to STUDY for my final exam....

PS: will update once holiday....

It been a long holiday but finally end....

2011-03-07T09:34:00.000-08:00

3 month had past and it just like a click of my eyes...
I know I been doing nothing on this holiday months...
so bored until doing something stupid....

I already mentions this at the past post....
but I stop it on the Penang trip...
The first day at Penang was damn spirit....
and went to the beach to take some photos...
after that .... *censored away* I don`t wanna spoil my image....
but it was fun... cause it was my first time...
seriously don`t think too narrow....

the second day, we went to several places...
especially historical...
one old temple on the city... i forget the real name =.=
then Kek Lo si Temple... famous in Penang...
it was so huge and also beautiful scenery...
I didn`t took picture at Penang trips...
cause of my phone had almost retarded...
After that Planned to go Penang hill..
I heard very nice... but the second times been there...
it was maintenance... damn hate this last minutes happen...
After that, we went for a walk on the Gurney Walk.....
wondering to see sunset... but all the cloud was blocked the sun...
the end of the second day, is by driving through the ferry and reach to Kedah....
( At night was hungry, wanted to go for Mamak at Kedah but some miscomunication)
we slept at friend house at Kedah....

The last day, we went to eat some specialty food in Kedah and drive back to hometown...
The overall was quite enjoying and also had closer gap between friends..
today was the first day of class... took 5 subject a bit worry .. but can manage...
nothing much at first day, just introduction the overview of the subject..

sometimes think back time... really miss out the fun...
sometimes think future time... really worry a lot...
therefore think the present time... it make u happy as if u got an present..

signing off,
Tommyterm

had abandon my blog for a fews days..

2011-02-27T13:51:00.000-08:00

The last post was talking about CNY ...
This year CNY was just moderate...
Angpau money was not as many as last year...
But I don't mind...
It just enough to get my stuffs that I planned to buy....
Actually... Angpau money is just heart that given by family members..

Oh ya, I remember... meeting up with my old buddies....
It really turn back to the time in school...
we discuss about the current economic issues that will happen in Malaysia...
some of them really change from good to bad..
just for some sick of socialize, some of them really went into smoking and alcoholic..

I still prefer my own self...
I think I did not change seem that time I saw them...
just some contact lens...

Oh ya, I and my college mate had went to KLCC by car....
and went for several places...
of course, not to forget the temple of Dong Fang Shi...
last year was nicer than this year...
this year was extra one huge circus for those children...
as usual it look beautiful as they are...

after that week of CNY, I did not went others places...
just some normal outing like KTV and also movies...
of course not to miss our badminton sports...

Just pass a few days, we went to badminton ...
I feel so energetic cause it was at night...
not sleepy and not tired...
then, it suddenly talk about Penang....
Penang was the last minutes plan...
Of course, not to worry about hotel and all those...
cause it was not the peak season...

Now was 6.10am in the morning...
was haven't slept...
so I better go for a nap...
Later 10am need to wake up again...

signing off,
Tommyterm

The whole time in holiday + first day of CNY

2011-02-03T11:45:00.000-08:00

Ya, It was true ..
I was searching for jobs throughout my holiday but once it reaches 2 more months left ...
I decide to get myself down...
cause will know by that time will be busy becoming a driver for my mother....
going out and in of the house...
a lot stuff had happens and I really believe my mother will more concern my brother instead of me...
sad case happen, until my shopping spree for CNY mood was broken ...

I brought just a one T-shirt that I like and others was just kinda not in taste...-.-
sometimes .. bought a clothes was not easy as it seem...
get myself headache when choosing...
my mother and my brother mind was getting more older look for me...
but myself .. I prefer younger look cause not yet so old...

Other than that, there are some others day was going for badminton with friends...
and also friend 21th Birthday party...
I miss the fun with my cousin Birthday party...
life is like that.. there are 2 road and need to choose the one that feel preferable...
I went Kuantan... and it was awesome with my cousins... haha...
(PS: sorry my friends .. didn't attend that birthday party and also PD trips)

Today is the second day of CNY ...
I was wanted to write on the first of CNY ...
but something happen...
make myself slept for a while ..

The early morning of CNY...
dragging myself off my comfortable bed...
and went to my grandparent house...
then later it went bored and sleepy =.=
after 3.30pm, drive off to MBO and watch a movie with my parent and grandpa...
then later on was straight went to my close grandparent aunt house...
on there... open up one Martell and Red wine...
Both should not mix cause the effect is so strong...
lucky I control my level of drinking...
and one of my cousin... when drunk=.=

( PS: It was really the first time saw my grandparent accept this situation )

I almost got myself drunk .. but still can make it through...
that is what make me slept a while ...

haha ... now was 4.16am in the morning ...
blogging about wat happen on the first day of CNY ...

sign off,
Tommyterm

What I had done on 2010?

2010-12-30T20:34:00.000-08:00

what I had done on year 2010 ?
This is a common question...
but sometime it also recall back the memories from January 2010 to December 2010...

January
~> busy with my mother in the Hospital
~> countdown New Year 2010 at Malacca
~> went to Malacca and Genting with a batch of friends...

February
~> it was a wonderful Chinese New Year...
~> grandparent outstation and had BBQ
~> go house visiting with friends

March
~> collage started and everything was a mess in the begining of the semester
~> busy on collage lifestyle ( getting textbook and all those)

April
~> had a headache and skipped a class...
~> had my contact lens

June
~> watched one piece ( first anime I catch for 2 week of holiday )
~> started my Badminton sport with a batch of friends

July
~> started my new semester
~> the last semester result was so slow out
~> worry the few week on result
~> can`t even select a proper timetable

August
~> it was my birthday and had some time with all those ECU members
~> it was the ECU steamboat
~> everyone was so happy that time and also Facebook continues the topic
~> planned to study but didn't done it ( lazy me )
~> got some trouble of friends influence but I resisted
~> got lost in the Jungle of FRS

September
~> mid semester break
~> still busy with assignment
~> had the bad time on holiday

October
~> busy busy time
~> exam close but yet not yet study
~> pressure on assignment and presentation
~> feel tired and moody the whole time

November
~> almost all my assignment
~> attend my first prom night
~> suit up like the first time
~> busy presentation and also wanted to end my assignment

December
~> the first few day was busy finding job ( accountant internship)
~> then each time got some critics said was too short and make an alternative jobs
~> went to Kelantan trips with my family
~> laying down with bored
~> finding other jobs

P.S. today is new year eve for 2011
my memories of recorded in my blog for each month ( expect May)

the limit of my life...

2010-11-23T10:52:00.000-08:00

There are a lot stuffs that happen in my life...
I don't know that you reader heard before about my bad lung...
sometimes saw the place where I vomit those blood...
really freaking me out....
sometimes feel the pain of my body ...
making me worry...

Yesterday, my body was in pain ....
thinking that the scene will happen again ...
didn't think much ...
asking my mother bring me to hospital...
for specialist check up....
cost me around Rm170++

i know it expensive .. but what to do ...
bad lung that the God gave me ....
had to suffer from struggling the pain...
had to suffer from expensive cost....
had to suffer from so many stuffs...

Yesterday ... was ready to tell everyone I going into hospital...
and also written a sms to said cancel today plan...
but yet ... lucky me ... didn`t really had to enter hospital...

Today... when searching for jobs....
I was thinking ... a bad health like this... still wanna find jobs ?
I prefer stay at home ...
then when thought of my friends that I drag them today ...
If I can't do the jobs... just left to them ...
at least they also finding jobs....

A bad health like me still can stand so long....
feeling of the melting candle in my heart...

sometimes people think the future was easy to predict ...
but there always hard to tell...
some people think I joking ... but I am not....

really the feeling of death is getting near to me ....
hoping someone beside me...
to hear what I think.....
to keep every secret.....
to wipe each tears of mine...
to see what I view...

P.S. dad, I wish you are here....

Almost one month abandon my blog...

2010-11-20T10:29:00.000-08:00

Let me start from Oct15 until now what had happen in my life...
( try to record every scenes)

First of all rush on my assignments...
I know most people hate assignments....
but it become a part of ECU life ...
2 Subject that is 100% assignment base....
and 2 Subject need 50% assignment and 50% of final exam...

While doing assignment .. of course some misunderstand happens ...
and conflicts .... (I don`t wanna record any bad news around here...)
But no matter what conflicts and misunderstand ...
sometimes .. it brings close relationship ....

After all those rushing ... of course, we had some break time....
that is when prom nite come into my life ....
prom nite for a farewell of HICT in Klang...
it was nice overall ... of course, my soul was not with me that time....
due to that assignment .. day and night was not enough sleep....
( that is why my soul was not around)

On that day .. my thought are going around and around....
because of assignment...preparation and all those stuffs...
now was think ... if my soul was around that time ... surely joining them into club sessions...
but everything was a past...
( don`t bother to think back sometimes)

After that nite ...was relax a bit ... but still need to rush assignment ...
revision and all those preparation for final paper....
was done in last minutes....
On assignment .. I saw some was struggling and some was done on time....
I know I wanna done my best for assignment and final paper...

Of course, stay up late night and wake up early morning...
will get my temper out of control.... ( I mean easily get anger)
but I try to control myself somehow ...
uncomfortable sleeping time will bring a mess on my days....

After the last presentation... my whole body feeling relief...
and also feel happy to done one huge documents with all efforts....
On that day also ... everyone need to start rushing for final ...
Lucky, tips are given... if not .. everyone was cracking brains....

On final week... once done my FRS paper ...
really felt disappointed... just done a biggest mistake somehow ....
scoring that paper.. was difficult...
just hoping it pass only ...
( doesn`t wanna get HD or D )
( the higher the expectation the higher the disappointment)

of course .. after that paper ...
3day for studying my law subject ...
try to bringing the letters and words into brains...
the only things I hate....
is memorize words...

but on that day... overall look like going well...
just some parts.. was trying to get some marks out of it...
Hopping my law will pass this time....
( suffer with law in my ECU life)

after the law test...
going back my normal life...
(sleeping is my number one concern)
I didn`t when back home...
just hanging around... and prepare for a celebration for Xin Yin...
I struggle on waking my brain up ....
and when through the day with all of them....
was happy .. yet tiring ..

PS: Finish all those assignment, Final paper and some events... making my whole brain tired...

I record that all on my brain....
I know I very fast forget .....
this give me an advantage ..
to forget all the sad scene.... and moving forward...
(sometimes just hate people bring up all those past)
past = past ... u can`t change a things from that ....

ok de la.. stop over here...

Had been abondan you for a while....

2010-10-06T05:46:00.000-07:00

Almost one month had not touch these blog...
missing the feeling on write somehow...
busy going up and down .... turning right to left...

All those words in internet had translate to a piece of assignment....
reading 100 words to get 1 meaning...
suddenly thinking .. what the use of assignment ?
just for a sick of marks... we had to do...

those tests need to make my head big enough to answer it ...
but after a moment... try to relax .. and those things had gone in my head...
wake up 24 hour to get my works done....
my sleeping time is getting so short...

feeling so tiring day by day...
wondering someone to come comfort me ...
wondering someone understand me.....
wondering someone to get along my life....

But there always nobody there....
tear drop at the moment that you left me alone...
heart pain when saw you suffer...
don`t know what should I do...

suddenly miss so many people in my life....
wondering can turn the clock back from the start ?

This 2 song me keep heard... it suit on my feeling right now ....

one week holiday~

2010-09-04T11:02:00.000-07:00

yea~! one week holiday going to be started...
but me can't holiday =(
assignment need to be start processing...
case study need to start read...
FRS need to study @@

a lot more work need to do...
last Friday and Saturday...
we had some fun with the juniors...
joking around and playing around...

badminton seem to be a sport sessions in my life..
book seem to be a bible that need to read....
assignment seem to be the stressed job in my life...

By the ways, organizing a thing is so damn bloody difficulties...
because others will had their family holiday...
and some of them will be busy...
@@ headache.... but dono why I prefer to organizing it... haha...

tomorrow will be Sunday...
normally christian will had Sunday school and had their praying going on...
but the sad part of my case is...
going to college for a lecturing....
Come on ~! Sunday lecture?? sux..

(Ps: Congrats to Huei , swallow a table medical)
(Ps: hate my lung getting uncomfortable ways of sleeping)

I am totally in troubles now!!

2010-08-22T11:26:00.000-07:00

I was plan to done my FRS chapter to up-to-date....
but it turn out...bad ..
I didn`t even touch that book for that four day that I planned...
I guess I been playing and wasted my time ...

need to get myself to be serious...
FRS test 1 is damn near and I still relaxing -.-!!
need to start my FRS revision whenever there is time ....

my Business plan @@ need to start to do also ...
ARGH!!! need to get myself to a serious mode....
lacking of time and also busy assignment ....
headache on my ways....

Wish me good luck friends...

A week had just pass

2010-08-15T09:56:00.000-07:00

A week had pass just a click of a mouse....
a lot trouble and difficulties last whole week...
I know some of you all was shock or surprise on my decision...
seriously, friends influence can`t effect me....
When the date and time give at that time...
my brain was thinking on the opportunity cost...
which date was better and there goes my decisions...

Monday for 6 hours is much more better than Tuesday...
some of you wondering why...
there always some different between you and me...
that make all the different....
( PS: you can ask me directly if you really wanna know)

On Wednesday, there always a lot of confusion on FRS @@
it just because didn`t study the topics yet ...
and there is when I decide to make it as a sleeping book...
(I mean before sleep , take and read at least a few pages...)

On Thursday onwards, busy until Sunday ...
busy at night and at afternoon and at morning....

On Friday, we so long didn`t play badminton had make us exhausted so fast =.=!!
and also people complaining muscle pain....
I think most of my friends didn`t exercise much ...

By the ways, just worry on my result that coming out...
and worry my FRS... still at the first chapter had not move yet ...
I need more time in one days.... T.T

it's monday

2010-08-08T11:28:00.000-07:00

Monday so fast reach de...
I was planned to study FRS instead of Facebook...
but ended up busy Facebook =.=

I read just a few pages in front...
then stop -.-
haiz ... need to get rip of computer in my life de...

By the way, read on the star online news..
found some interesting topics and post on facebook...
diseases seem like getting more and also death =.=
death due to silly love ?
death due on silly disease?
really wasted life ....
haiz... dono what can do to stop it @@

people around me asking to get a GF ..
but what I can do is denied...
I think just need to wait for a person...
and also get silly dream about it... @@

GF seem to be less important than my study...
actually we had waste all our life into study...
since the day, we enter kindergarten up to secondary school...
it had been around 10 year in studies....

so just need to keep on study until the end of the days...
knowledge is so important than getting a real lifestyle...
haha...
need to go to bed...
if not tomolo, 6hour of lecture -.-

Steamboat for ECU

2010-08-06T11:48:00.000-07:00

Never knew that we had out for one whole day...
The first things that was after class...
out for snooker and also watch movie...
found some that watching the same show as us...

but after that...
people was going crazy in the steamboat...
didn`t expected to be....

groups had divide us but yet our soul had some connection...
too bad there are some group not joining us for dinner...
it was fun ... playing around with seniors and juniors...
chat at facebook....
like nobody business..

never thought that they will going so extreme....
and also one of the friends was so happy...
the crowd was amazing ....
the food had fill up the whole tank...
the laughter had full of enjoyable time...

really didn`t miss out such an amazing event...
hoping there will be more interesting for the next year....
and also hoping that everyone was happy...

20th birthday just ended

2010-08-05T09:37:00.000-07:00

Actually I always dream before my birthday...
dream about what going to happen..
and also dream what I going to be in the future...

but mostly none of it happen..=(
actually was thinking my brother will purposely return home...
and give me a surprise...but none....

Then on the second thought of my sisters ...
will come down Klang like last year..
give me a huge surprise... but none...

Then on the third thought of my aunt and my cousin...
will suddenly come and give me a surprise....
but none...

Therefore, I think that every time I dream....
none will happen...

I don`t mind...just get use to be alone with the computer ...
celebrate wit my computer by watching drama...
lolz... funny me ...

sometimes, people said a Birthday is just an ordinary day...
and sometimes, people said it a miracle day that is the day that u are born...
so I think both almost the same...

but really grateful that recieve so many wishes from my friends and cousin...
err... actually me having a useless brother...
didn`t get anything and any wish from him....
lolz...

nothing much happen on my birthday ...
as I just treat it as my holiday ...
haha...

PS: worry about result and also my assignment...

Patience also had a limit

2010-08-01T10:31:00.000-07:00

Talking about patience...
I very patience is small problems....
even you accidentally hit or scolded the wrong person...
but there always a limit of it...

I easily get piss off if a person deliver a wrong massages and effect the leading...
wrong info can make a huge mistake and also effect every single things beside...
these is against my patience...
but ...
after a few minutes those anger get disappear...

really hate to get myself piss off....
once piss off.. everyone beside me will get shock ... lol...=.=

Now everything back to normal...
just need to claim myself in a silence place....

by the ways, tomorrow class start at 11am or 12pm...
everyone was not sure...
because of that stupid coordinator give wrong info...

hoping 12pm is the time that start class...
and also hoping my results was all passed...

New semester, More stress

2010-07-28T11:29:00.000-07:00

It had been a month doesn`t update...
because on the holiday mood, enjoy my drama and also One Piece...
It seem like most of the people enjoy on watch Anime specially those interesting one...
I didn`t watch much Anime...
Just some but One Piece really attract me one episode by one episode...
a lot of challenge that they face and they spirit they had in their heart..
unbelievable scenes can be seem in the show...

the whole holiday was busy watch One Piece...
and also waiting for result...
can`t sleep well and worry throughout my whole night...

even the class start by 3 day ...
the result and the decision that been make wasn`t a confirmation...
books that need to buy was a total mess...
everyone is kinda lost in the huge jungle....

hoping the result was out fast=.=

Other than that, seem like attending 3 subject of lecture...
and the Unit Plan for the whole semester seem like a nightmare...
INB2302 need to build a company and make analysis...
week 7 need to prepare one whole bundle of tasks...
BES2100 as usual ASSIGMENT is like a mad subject...
ACC2700 presentation 10% is a huge amount....
and also need look smart, be communicative, interaction and also understand the topics well

These semester will be more presentation and also ASSIGMENT...
It seem to be 3am but me need to wake up at 8am...
wat the hack!! I can`t sleep... worry result ...

I think these will be the end of my post...
hope my life will be more interesting^^v

What a life I had ??

2010-06-29T23:27:00.000-07:00

I just a little bored these days..
so planned to update the blog...
I know I lost my spirits of continues these blog when one by one of my friend left it blog empty...

That is why I left is so long in silences~~

3 month passed and I didn`t even touch my blog...
I pass through but just look at my friends updated blog ...
My exam finish and now lay back at house relax for the next three week....

it quite a adventures life I got into ...
because I am total different from others people...
suffering and stress really got myself in a difficult time...
Sometimes need to struggle myself and all my strength to push me up every morning..

On the whole semester is all about presentation ....
me don`t even get a piece of ideas of from the subject -.-!!
except for account.... learn quite a lot...

OK... stop thinking of these after all passed ...
badminton seem to be the only sport I doing now ...
I don`t know still can continues with my basketball...
therefore, planing to give a try someday....

Other than that, now enjoying watching one piece...
there are about 450++ episode ...
don`t know can finish watch until the latest or not @@

ok la.. really got no ideas what to continues write...
maybe the next post will be more...

One month passed .. and I didn`t know that it so fast -.-!!

2010-04-15T17:16:00.000-07:00

My life goes on as normal ...
But last week had a unusual headache come to me ...
that was on last Monday, I can`t even think of anythings...
It really like someone pressing my brain and those pain like bang into a wall...
I close my eyes ... and it try to take a rest..
dono why it reflect my memory back to the day I met her....
nothing else I can do... just take a dream of it...

after all those dream...
I skip a class where on the morning ...
and the time was so fast until my second class wanted to start...
I rush to college to attend that class...

I tell myself, what had happen these morning ..
something wonderful or something bad ??

A the night of Monday, my brother call...
my mother like ... "faster faster .. go fetch ur brother..."
then I goes .." ok ok "
drive all the ways to AEON to pick up my brother...
on the ways, back ... I tell my brother.. "I wanna give a try on contact lens..."
He straight away said .. the shop haven`t close.. you can go now if u wan...
Then I like NOW~~!!!
he said YA ~~ if not u wanna wait when -.-!!
so goes to that shop...
On the shop, taking 2 times of eyes examine....
then only learn to wear contact lens....
slowly by slowly ..
I just like took 5 min to enter or less than that..

Those shop keeper " if everyone like you , we can save a lot of time de"
I like there laughing all my ways back home ... haha ...

YAP~~ I try to wear contact lens.... and it seem easy -.-!!

Week 3 of my college start ..

2010-03-16T08:24:00.000-07:00

The first week ..
I had a problem of change my course from majoring accounting to double major ...
It really give me a huge headache day and night without stop thinking of it ...
and ended up with double majoring ...

on the first week ...
I enjoy some lecturer teaching style and some as usual bored....
pressure give was giving me motivation ...
but without textbook really a trouble...

the second week ...
busy with so many stuff...
I don`t really remember some of it de...
but really enjoy at my brother "subang house" ..

time goes really fast ..
all those happiness sometime just left behind....
me look like crazy person busy on so many stuff .....

the third week got textbook de...
but without reading on the textbook can`t done my tutorial ...
another problem .. I need time !!
why time move so fast ... don`t even know ....

hardworking of mine body ...
faster come back to me .....
I hate being lazy ... -.-!!

ok de la.. I think time goes by my life will be better ....

After 3 month of resting and college start de....

2010-02-28T07:43:00.000-08:00

I didn`t realize .. time really fly ...
busy here and there ....
rushing in my life time really make my life move very fast....
Chinese people say the 15 date of new year started in Chinese calender...
is the ending of celebration for Chinese New Year....

Today is the ending of Chinese New year and also the ending of my holiday ...
3 month passed just like a wind....
watch a few movie with the frenz....
and also visit places that interesting near klang area....

me had learn a lot ... and also fall down....
life is really complicate if u don`t understand each another ...
and something true can`t be tell and had to change to fake...

haiz ... walk in my path of life ...
really need to change a lot of things....
anyways ..

hope tomorrow had great day for me ...

CNY was great for one week

2010-02-24T21:01:00.000-08:00

These year Chinese New Year was great ...
Chinese New Year Eve ...
grandparent was out station and some relative was free ...
so we make a BBQ session at my grandparent house..
I never thought it was a great ideas...
BBQ in the middle of the roadside and having joy and fun talking wit cousins....

A short period of time just pass ....
we like 1million years didn`t met ...
talking crap and also talking some funny stuff ...
really enjoy ... that night was hot and cold..
cause it rain after all those BBQ session done ...

The first day ...
I went to some relative house and some cousin friend house...
enjoy my day .. and damn tired....

The second day ...
didn`t went much place ...
just went to my schoolmate house and busy with my day de....
Oh ya ... my cousin left the dogs in my house and went to Pangkor...
get use wit a dog in my house .... haha...

The third day ...
when to my collage-mate houses ....
and also we went for a movie ...
it was late night ... and ending trip in my house ...
damn tired and sleep everyone look .. haha ...

The Forth day ..
didn`t go much place at the afternoon ...
Just busy on some stuff ...
then around 5pm at JJ Aeon ... we chat and walk ...
end up at KKS house to get a place to wait those rain gone ...
then only move up to Dong Zen Temple ..
it was a famous temple in Selangor...
wonderful and nice time ...

The rest of the day ....
I was busy hunting for second hand car ...
my brother get a headache .. so do me...
helping him to find one...
up and down and left and right of the city .....
too many second hand shop ...
one by one enter .. really get yourself tired and exhausted...

My college life is going to start ...
worry ? excited ? nervous ?
don`t know what feeling will had ...
mixed like cendol ...

Missing me in Holiday season

2010-02-07T09:16:00.000-08:00

Everyone that read my blog or look at my blog ....
wonder where I missing all those days ??
time really fly sometimes...

On December was busy with my mother condition in SJMC ...
and now she is back on health back ....

that was my hard time ... where going up and down Subang Jaya @@
and I was busying taking a good care of the house and arranging some of my time ...

really need to thanks God for protecting my mother all these time ...
I hardly sleep and hardly happy and hardly smile on that time ....
( Ps: me also worry so many stuff until keep forget what I need to do next )

On the January, my mother was back from SJMC ...
and she stay at grandparent house of some reasons...
me also the same busy here and there ...
but the best part ....

I got to enjoy on the Malacca trips with my schoolmates ....
I got to enjoy on Genting trips with collage mates...
that was the best time on January ...
other than that, I was helping out my mother and also work as part-timer....
really enjoy and busy on the same time ....

yea... my sisters come down to Klang twice on January..
really appreciate them with the time ...
they also introduce me to a person that live in Klang....
( Ps: love you both sister ...)

Ending of the January , I went to Sungai Wang ( money river ) with my friends...
when back home , my aunty ask why didnt tell her -.-!!
cause she wanna go also ....
anyways, go out wit friends... and dono she wanna go also ...@@

OK ....
On these month a bit rushing for Chinese New Year...
clean house ... up and down and left and right ..
more easy to say .. the whole house ...
haha....

and my car... OMG .. haven`t wash yet ...
busy with cleaning house.....
and also went to night market for foods and cookies ...

Chinese New Year so close ....
but preparing ... 40% only -.-
anyways, these year Chinese New Year Eve will be missing ...
all relatives going to their own paths...
and of course the head of the family ( grandparent) went to Australia...

wonder what will be our CNY eve...
and also wonder who we will met ....
and also wonder what going to be in CNY....

haha ... new life and new starting for us...
Hope will had a great time ...

(PS : another scene forget to written down, faint in my mother dialysis center and nurses try to help me ... haha .. that was 4 February 2010 )
(PS : I will try to post blog when free)

A day With my Friend on One Utama

2009-11-25T18:14:00.001-08:00

Yesterday... It really tired and nice time with my friends....
Early in the morning ..
waking up at 7.30 am cause scare not ticket from movie in One Utama...
It was really early for me .. ( Holiday samore need to wake up so early )
when off my car at 8.20am cause think can eat at mamak very fast breakfast ...
but yet what happen after fetching my friend and me...
when for Mamak( modern Cui Luing) The time so fast gone ..
really fast ... so late reach there ...plus traffic jam at the bridge
( due to some mistake of my decision)
But yet starting at 9.25am at the college ....

everyone also waiting actually ..
lucky reach the time was so coincidence all reach ... haha...
So we took off at that time ... reach there at 10.05am ++ only ...
so faster went to cinema for ticket and we window-shop before the movie start ...
going one whole circle ... and back to the main point was 2012 movie...

2012 was extremely nice and touching movie ....
and the graphic nice...
I imagine myself was in there ...
and it was really very sad, the ego feeling of people and the money face bitch ...
I really get touch and almost cry... but yet... didn`t cry... haha...
I think my friends didn`t had an experience as I do ....
so they really can`t think what I am thinking ...

I like some part where the person say
" Because of these things, everyone become a monster ... and lost the humanity "
and also one part he say
" the founder who tell me these had dead and we owe him a life "

really damn nice words that I take ...
really everyone had change because of money and their family
some of them really stress out and had to kill others for the sick of their own...

SICK OF THEIR OWN ... so really damn EGO those Ego feeling ..
looking back on some time of ego citizen didn`t help me up ...

and also really so Kill the founder and of their own name as history
" lembu punya susu , susu dapat sapi"
( don`t know my Malay language still ok or not )
EGO seem to take over people attitude and also kill their own race...

wondering one day where nobody there for you and nobody had fun with you ...
all become silence and quite ... you are happy for a short period ...
but for long period ... really a damn pathetic life ....

After watching these show ... really feel down of a moment...
and backup myself to enjoy my time with my friends....

after that we when for more window-shopping ...
One Utama had a lot of those computer and handphone shops ...
really had a time with my friends...

walk a long walk ... then 5 pm was meet below the cinema ...
after all we look and experience the window-shop....
really can see the different price of one item...
then the girls was wanted to window-shop and buy things...
ask us wait until 6pm ...
it was 5.30pm and we when for POOL for a while ...

reach 6pm .. off we go back to Klang ...
really damn enjoying time on some jokes and game...
went to the place we want to eat (Bostan)
Bostan , my friends said was very delicious and nice to eat ...
so take a taste of it...

At that time, we joke around the table and really had a great time ....
seriously .. the food is delicious ... and also fresh ...
these dinner really need to thanks my friend mother ( Ah wei mother) for treat us...

when back around 9pm ... then take a bath ..
wait for people to play dotA ..
we play so many round dotA and really enjoy ..
up to 2am in the morning ...
Planing wanna go mamak eat ... but these KKS put aeroplane ...
he also make us feel hungry us feel hungry at that time ..
so tired ... and when to bed at 2.30am...

PS: We will treat back my friend mother ( Ah wei mother) and also with a delicious foods ^^v

Busy on MYOB

2009-11-20T06:42:00.000-08:00

These second post was a bout the MYOB ..
there are still the same conflicts happen on the first one ...
dono what to do ..
just simply do and get marks ...
MYOB .. stupid software ... didn`t had any instruction also...

we start to do these on Tuesday and continue to Thursday ....
10 am ... me getting tired and sleepy the whole time because 3 am sleep...
I know everyone hate Po Guam ..
sometimes really mercy him but he give a damn to me ...
Haiz~~
I hoping I got magic to change people attitude ...
but me don`t have..

Sorry reader ..
if me keep written down my unhappy things instead of my happy life...
my mind keep on thinking of the unhappy things instead of happy things ...
life is really complicate ..
you personally don`t want these to happen ... but it really will happen ...
we never know ... accept God know ...

OK de la.. Bye bye MYOB and My Final Exam in my mind ..

Happy can DotA day and night ...
Happy can relax my mind after using the whole semester...
Happy can sleep one whole day ...

The next thing I need to do is find JOB!!

Ps: both couples when for happy hour on Friday left me alone at house ... (Bored)

Exam time

2009-11-20T06:18:00.002-08:00

Sorry for my reader ..
I know I been Missing in Action seem the day I plan to study ...

Not really all my plan were moving correctly ..
but we did some group study at library and even senior helping us...
I did when for a few time to college because of these final exam ...
everyone is nervous .. and worry the hardest question will come out...

4 branch of ECU student waiting in the exam hall really damn crowded ..
The first day was account...
not really shock on the question ..
seem like is 1,2,3 instead of a,b,c ... I really need to score for the paper ...
that paper was hoping for my HD ...

really done all and my mind keep say is these method correct or wrong ..
ended finish .. and had to forget the paper to move on to the next .....

The second day was International Bussiness...
who know what coming out ... even we don`t know the structure ....
we when to Raymond and even to the lecturer ...
asking what the structure look like ...

That paper really damn shocking ..
one page .. and there are one question keep hanging on my mind is..
" make your own question and answer the question "
What the hack ... never saw these question in exam before in my life ...
hoping to score that 10 marks ... and limited time make me rushing ...
still got one thing I not satisfied on my answer is I didn`t put any case study ...
the lecturer say case study not so important ..
everyone really regret didn`t focus on case study...

The third day was the management ..
management was seem like ... speechless ...
I need to rush from the start of the exam until the end ...
really no time to write finish ... hand was paining like hell de...
I know two question from the case study is been screwed by me (myself) ...
really damn hate that paper ... argh ~~ really making me stress on the last paper ...

at the third day really stress out and had to relax myself by DotA ...
haiz ... after that was no mood on the Saturday ...
and can`t remember my laws

I rush through all the lecture and trying to remember ..
but my mind wan BLANK the whole time...

The last day should be happy .. but I really feel sorry and sad after the exam...
That paper was speechless too...
3 case study need 1 page on each questions..
I done is 3/4 page only .. really dono what to write in de...
all was like written down already
and my mind was wondering why everyone keep writing ??
everyone like rushing to finish ..
and me like waiting the time past on the exam ...

DAMN !! haiz ...
hoping my exam result was alright ..
at least a pass can done it all ...

These is what I planned

2009-10-19T06:39:00.000-07:00

I don`t know about most of my friends does planing or not ..
but I need to make some plans sometimes ....

I had to plan my study and some leisure time for myself....
I always put a high judgment on myself and believe whatever it was ... I will do it ....
I think some people think I am crazy ... do such an impossible things ....
but I know ... I trust myself on these all hard-worked can had a good result coming ...

I plan to finish study my account and my laws lecture....
moreover, I will take some time on the questions ....
These plan is for one week time ... I believe I can done it ....
basically, study laws will take a longer time ..
so I will be done by these coming Friday....
Saturday and Sunday ... what more~~ account all my ways....

Next week ...

I plan to finish my International Business study and my management...
management take a longer time too ...
I think International Business is critical thinking subject ...
so just need information is enough for me ....

then the last week .. got to do some revision on the question ....
hehe .. then hoping at the end of the day ..

flying colour come to me ...

PS: on these study time .. my forgetfulness will increase..
and hoping my friends will help me ... ^^v

~Lawyer~

2009-10-17T08:52:00.000-07:00

After reading a bit of Legal framework ...
become a lawyer is not easy as we think ...
and some Chinese say that .... is a duck that keep calling non-stop....

These picture as I show .. exactly what Chinese people mean ?

haha .. just joking ...
People use the words to twists and turns ..
sometimes is convince the judiciary and win the cases...

some people say that language is the most important things ...
ya... they are rite...
if we understand every words they meant...
there won`t be any conflict and we also can easily twists and Turns on those matters...

do you think of these after all ?
Twist and Turns can make the world be better ...
but languages also the most important if not ...
we are like the duck and the chicken...

...haha...

~Misunderstanding ~

that why language are much important than whatever in life ....
actually I also regrets on learn Chinese words...
but at least I speak to increase my Chinese language on myself ...
^^v

BTW, is late night ... better read my Law ... haha ...

PS: these post is what I think throughout my reading in laws book ... haha...

The First Foot Step On My New Blog

2009-10-17T01:21:00.001-07:00

Yeah !!
changing blog is a problem .. wasting my time 1hour and 30 min.....
=.=!! need to start my law study now de... or not scare later no time to do ....

~My blog still under construction~
Maybe me too bored here ..
that why done some of things de..

Welcome my reader...
hoping my old readers will keep in touch with me by these blog...
^^v